Exposing Elon’s Budget Chainsaw Massacre

He Promised Savings, but Delivered Chaos—Here’s What He’s Really Cutting

Raise your hand if you knew, without a doubt, that when Elon Musk said he was going to uncover fraud and waste by starting a pseudo-government agency with the same name as his scam crypto coin, he was full of DOGE.

All of your hands should be in the air now. Go ahead and put your hand down, or feel free to hoist a middle finger at Elmo while it’s up.

It’s not enough that he’s literally the richest person on the planet and well on his way to becoming the world’s first trillionaire. But this charlatan of the highest order is using his considerable resources and his Twitter megaphone to spread his lies and deceit to convince America he’s cutting services to save us money.

One of the biggest lies that he’s weaponized to silence dissent and criticism of his psychotic moves is that whoever opposes his budget slashing actually LIKES fraud and is literally on the take, which is simply absurd. "You’re either with me or with the terrorists" is the sort of disingenuous logic his framing embraces.

He and his merry band of anonymous twenty-something hackers have been taking a slapdash, strategy-free approach to cost-cutting, often using a chainsaw where a scalpel would most certainly be more prudent and effective. They’ve eliminated hundreds of positions in the FAA dealing with flight safety, as well as nuclear weapons experts who keep us safe, and dozens dealing with the bird flu that is jacking up the price of eggs.

The mission of the Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE) is supposedly to uncover a vast sea of fraud and waste, totaling in the trillions, in order to pass those newfound savings back to the American people. Much efficient! Very savings! Such amaze! So bullshit—they haven’t produced ONE receipt showing fraud.

Don’t get me wrong: I actually agree with the core concept of uprooting waste and fraud, but only if the person or people tasked to do it are engaging in the pursuit in good faith. That means no selfish or nefarious ulterior motives, and that’s where Apartheid Clyde loses me, because he has everything to gain and no intention of recusing himself.

Let’s start with his official title: he doesn’t have one. He’s not the administrator—that position was just thrust upon the unsuspecting Amy Gleason, after almost a month of draconian cuts and within a day of White House Press Gaslighter Karoline Leavitt being pressed for that info.

In fact, when she was repeatedly asked by a reporter three times, she finally relented and said, "I’m not going to reveal that... We’ve been incredibly transparent," in the least transparent way a person could utter those words with a straight face.

Transparency is a HUGE problem with this frenetic endeavor, which employs 19-year-old characters like Edward Coristine, nicknamed "Big Balls," who is neither a government official, nor vetted, nor even an accountant. He and the others are just coders—people you’d call to build a website or to hack one.

They’ve been granted unfettered access to the most sensitive information in our nation’s databases, including our Social Security information. Let me say this: when I write down my Social Security number on a form, I always look around to make sure nobody else is watching. There isn’t even that level of protection for our sensitive data from these guys, and we don’t even know what they’re doing with it.

What Elon’s DOGE bros have is a billion times more sensitive and insane. They are just some internet randos that nobody knows, other than Elon’s guarantee of "trust me, bro," and they have read and write access to America’s data, which should have everyone’s hair on fire. Because who wouldn’t trust a guy who successfully slapped four wheels onto a metal dumpster and sold it as a $100K Cybertruck? To the military, no less.

Oh yeah—that’s yet another glaring concern for Elon’s maneuvers: his conflict of interest. I mean, he stands to make half a billion (approximately $400 million) on those expensive "all-terrain" trucks, whose major weaknesses are water and snow. Seriously, YouTube it—it’s fucking hilarious.

And I guess that’s why they put Pete Hegseth at the top of the Pentagon, because only a drunken fool would sign off on a ridiculously bad deal like that. He might even sign off on toilet seats that cost $10,000 or hammers that cost $1,000.

Some of you folks may be too young to remember this, but I remember hearing about that grift in the late ’80s, and it’s still an issue. No, I am 100% sure they aren’t actually paying that much for the toilet seats, but they are using it to hide expenses for OTHER things that Congress might not readily approve.

And Elon, if you haven’t found THAT shit with your buzzsaw, bazooka budget approach to cost-cutting, you’re not really looking, you’re on the take yourself, or perhaps it wasn’t really ever about saving money for Americans, was it? Nope.

When he’s not firing workers from the Veterans Crisis Centers that keep our veterans from hurting themselves, Musk’s focus has been on the smallest of the small expenses: $10,000 here, $50,000 there. If you were trying to lose weight, it’s like removing a few strands of spaghetti from your plate of spaghetti and meatballs and thinking that’s going to help you lose five pounds.

Some of Elon’s supposed examples of fraud were complete bullshit, like the accusation that $50 million worth of condoms were being sent to Hamas, and then that amount became $100 million before it was debunked, but then repeated on live TV by trump in front of millions and not fact-checked (of course).

Pepper in some woke-sounding phrases like "transgender surgery" or "LGBTQ+-centered comic books in Peru" (I swear, some of these things sound made up), and it sounds like Elon is perhaps onto something. AHA, fraud!!!

Aha, not so fast—these are things that Congress signed off on. You know, they sat in that stuffy room and had official votes over these things, as weird or dumb as some of them might seem. But at the end of the day, these are tiny, infinitesimally small line items.

The entire budget for USAID, started by President Kennedy and extremely useful in flexing America’s positive influence across the globe, is $42 billion. Now, to you and me, that seems like a TON. But in the big picture, it is less than 1% of the overall budget. And some of those random, seemingly arbitrary expenses are a total of 1% of that budget.

So, Elon, you threw out the baby with the bathwater to save one percent of one percent? What the FUCK are we supposed to do with that? Nothing.

For all the fireworks and folderol, is Elon even saving us ANY money? His much ballyhooed receipts have shown, in one case, savings of $8 billion dollars for… what’s that? You say it’s not $8 BILLION, it’s only $8 MILLION? Ah, what’s a decimal point between charlatans? A fucking ACCOUNTANT would know the difference.

Musk’s DOGE is all flash, no bang. It actually boggles my mind that people STILL think Elon is some kind of genius, because he’s coming off really stupid, and no amount of rigging the Twitter algorithm will change that.

Because it’s all a goddamn shell game. Elon promised to cut a ridiculous $2 trillion from the budget, a number he cannot attain unless he cuts Social Security and Medicare. So, with all of these bombastic moves, there is a great outcry, America pushes back, but at least it LOOKS like he did everything he could to keep his promise—if not for those pesky liberals, he’d have gotten away with it.

At the very least, he gets to strike a blow against "the woke mind virus" and cement his newfound status as the co-King of MAGA, ensuring that he is included in every major policy decision going forward.

If he were truly interested in making a real difference, he would have kept a bunch of the experienced inspectors general that he fired, because they’d been finding tens of billions of dollars over the years and returning it to taxpayers.

Instead of using a chainsaw, he could have used a scalpel. If you’re helping a hoarder clean house, you don’t burn the whole thing down. You help them preserve some irreplaceable things, pack up family pictures and valuable heirlooms, and throw out the trash and waste.

But he seems to be gleefully firing big swaths of real people—folks who work for the Parks Department, the FAA, and other essential federal positions. Are they ALL essential? Maybe not. But there’s certainly no need to rush through these at a breakneck pace unless chaos and pain is the goal.

He was recently seen at CPAC, having been gifted an actual chainsaw, wielding it menacingly and yelling "CHAINSAW" like a juvenile who’d had his first beer with a tequila chaser, instead of a sober adult about to make some tough decisions involving people’s livelihoods and mortgages.

But Americans, feisty bunch that we are, do not like being tread upon, I'm pretty sure there are flags saying NOT to do that. It's taken a while, but there is an emerging trend of angry bipartisan voters showing up at Town Halls and town-halling the shit out of their elected leaders.

Because, as it turns out, nobody enjoys much having an out-of-touch billionaire choosing in a slipshod fashion what things HE thinks we need, and what things are merely "fraud" as he sees it, evidence be damned—he will NOT be denied that tax cut. And what they like even LESS is to have the richest man on Earth, who receives billions in government subsidies, calling hard-working Americans "parasites."

What really kills me, though, in this discussion about millions of dollars being spent helping our depressed veterans, or feeding single-mom families, or feeding poor communities across the globe, is that Elon could pull change from his couch to SOLVE world hunger and still be the richest guy on Earth.

He could be a fucking HERO to everyone and still be a trillionaire, still fuck off forever to Mars. Instead, he has chosen to use his considerable wealth and influence to punch DOWN on society’s most vulnerable in the pursuit of more wealth that he can’t possibly spend in an entire lifetime.

Instead, he’s punching down to become the world’s richest internet troll.

Do you know anyone personally who's been affected by Elon's chainsaw DOGE cuts? What do YOU think is the best way for Americans to effectively reject Elon Musk’s moves? Should we focus on tying Elon's unpopular, out-of-touch negative ratings to trump?

Let's hear your ideas.

Please and thank you.